mind the financial gap

personal fun-and-games
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image the year is 2042 and the local train station has not aged a day

welcome to consumerism in 2042

the age where your ideas are no longer solved but sold. the age where ssris are the new haribos. the age where help2buy means help2fundtomytriptopisa.

definition

consumerism (from Urban Dictionary) - is the practice of conspicuously buying flashy, expensive items and expecting them to fill the voids in one’s life

four stages

kubler-ross has the five stages of grief, we’ll stay optimistic and declare the four steps of the consumer:

  1. healthy boy
  2. unexpected challenge
  3. dip into the overdraft
  4. the knight in shining armour

1. healthy boy consumerism

consumerism is quite healthy actually. fancy a new pair of nike supershoes, that hybrid bike on cycle2work or the latest samsung noise-cancelling headphones? congratulations you’re now me. but really its people’s money and they can do what they want with it and play whatever games they like

2. unexpected consumerism

image the majority of our spend is probably for conveniences - the groceries, the bills, the streaming subscriptions - a combination of things we need and want. sadly we also have to pay for inconveniences - crappy wifi, selling crappy furniture that got leaked on or i guess smashing a lego spaceship into a wall.

3. the overdraft

so you’ve spent healthily - or seemingly so and bam unexpected fees are due. there’s no free parking on this monopoly board and you definitely haven’t got any properties to mortgage. its 2042 - you ain’t got savings so its on the groupchat. sorry lads can’t play footgolf today. i’m broke.

4. the saviour

image the dad in the group will cover you - at least temporarily so. bish bash bosh. and before you know it, you’re back home after gallivanting in the lads’ twenty year old yaris. after a solid cup of milk in the evening, you look ahead to the next month. ah junior doctor strike dates are out. perfect. but wait do i still get paid?

public disclaimer - rishi sunak is not my dad

this wasn’t so bad

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