the isle of goals

wait where are you?

twelve months ago in the medical school common room. we’re all announcing where we’ve got. it comes to me. so did you get jersey? (i was in the bottom 15 of ranked wessex applicants so expected jersey). nah, isle of wight. well if it was jersey, i would have to come visit you. fucks sake hannah. not now.

so six months as a first year doctor. i’m on the isle of wight.

so what’s it like then?

• the athlete’s village
• the fishbowl
• the asda
• the patient

the athlete’s village

hospital accommodation is actually quite glamorous. who am i kidding - its literally socially dead halls. but as with a lot of things in life - it is what you make of it. weekday pubs with the lads. group lasagnas with the housemates. track sprints with the 18 year olds.

the fishbowl

you’re moving to and working in a rural district general in the middle of buttfuck nowhere. good luck.

but as a new starter in any new job - you’re literally just trying to survive and maybe more importantly find a way to survive. and in healthcare you communicate a lot and its only natural you get to know a lot of people and so how do you get the best out of people. and in healthcare its basically the game.

now on the inverse - if you do something that might get the worst out of people. the hospital’s gonna know. and that is the fishbowl.

the asda

mate asda has these chicken piri-piri thighs. bloody piff.

the patient

patients are smart - especially older patients. they’ve been around the block. so patients know when you’re chatting shit. and i’ve absolutely loved patient conversations. why did my scan get cancelled? would you like the patient-friendly answer or honest answer. is it cancer? there is a possibility yes but given you are in hospital - this is simply the best possible place to have treatment sooner. why haven’t i had an ascitic drain yet. give me 15 minutes to run around and i’ll have an answer.

for patients and relatives. those two minutes will probably be the most important two minutes of their day. and it may be two of the most important minutes of their lives. without getting too existential. its pretty coool.

the journey of dr waffle continues.